In most states, yes, you can adopt your friend, provided both of you are adults and your state’s statute doesn’t limit adult adoption to relatives or people who lived in your home. About two-thirds of states allow any adult to adopt any other adult. The court process is short compared with adopting a child, but the decree is permanent and reshapes both families in ways that catch people off guard.
Whether Your State Allows It
The baseline rule almost everywhere is that both people have reached the age of majority, which is 18 in nearly every state. A handful of states use 21 for adoption purposes. Many states also require the adopter to be older than the adoptee, and roughly a third require a minimum age gap, typically 10 to 15 years. Courts can sometimes waive the gap when the adoption clearly serves both parties.
Several states go further and would block or complicate adopting a friend outright:
- Alabama limits adult adoption to people who are permanently disabled or have an intellectual disability.
- Idaho and Illinois generally require that the adoptee lived in the adopter’s home for a period of time, usually one to two years.
- Arizona restricts adult adoption to stepchildren, nieces, nephews, cousins, grandchildren, and former foster children.
- Louisiana requires judicial authorization for most adult adoptions unless the adopter is the spouse or surviving spouse of the adoptee’s parent.
- Connecticut, Massachusetts, and several other states specifically prohibit adopting a spouse, sibling, uncle, or aunt.
Because the rules swing so hard from state to state, the first real step is reading your own state’s adult adoption statute.
Consents and the Court Process
Adult adoption is essentially an agreement between two consenting adults, and that is what makes it simple. The adoptee’s written consent goes to the court with the petition. Biological parents generally do not need to consent once the adoptee is over 18; courts can dispense with every consent other than the adoptee’s. If the adopter is married, most states require the spouse to join the petition or file separate written consent, because the adoption creates new inheritance rights and family obligations for the household.
The petition is filed in the probate or family court where either of you lives. It identifies both people, describes the relationship, and explains why you want the adoption. Many courts publish standard forms. After filing, the court sets a hearing. Both parties typically appear, the judge confirms consent, and asks about the purpose. There are no home studies, background checks, or waiting periods in most states.
Judges do look for red flags: signs the adoption is being used to manipulate a third party’s estate, evade creditors, or manufacture immigration eligibility. Be ready to explain your genuine reasons plainly. Filing fees run roughly $100 to $350 depending on the jurisdiction. Many people handle the process without a lawyer; hiring one adds to the cost.
What the Decree Actually Does to Your Legal Families
This is the part most people underestimate. Adoption doesn’t just add a new legal parent. It replaces the old ones. In most states, a final adoption decree severs the legal parent-child relationship between the adoptee and their biological parents, and the adoptee is treated in all respects as if born to the adoptive parent.
In practice, that means the adoptee loses the legal right to inherit from biological parents under intestacy laws, which are the default rules when someone dies without a will. Biological parents lose any legal claim to make medical decisions for the adoptee or to inherit from them. Next-of-kin status shifts entirely to the adoptive family. If a biological parent later dies without a will, the adoptee may have no standing to claim a share of that estate.
Some states carve out exceptions, particularly for stepparent adoptions where ties to one biological parent survive. For adopting a friend, where no pre-existing family connection exists, the severance is typically complete. Weigh the new relationship against what you or your friend give up, especially if either of you expects to inherit from biological relatives or relies on them for medical decision-making.
Inheritance and Your Existing Estate Plan
After the decree, the adoptee has the same inheritance rights as a biological child of the adoptive parent. If the adoptive parent dies without a will, the adoptee shares in the estate under intestacy alongside any biological children. Formalizing inheritance rights is one of the most common reasons people pursue adult adoption in the first place.
The less obvious effect is on documents already in place. If your will or trust leaves assets to “my children” or “my descendants,” an adopted friend may automatically become a beneficiary and reduce what other family members receive. Many third-party trusts, on the other hand, are drafted to limit “descendants” to people adopted before age 18, which would exclude an adult adoptee from those trusts entirely. Courts have split on how to read these clauses. In a 2022 Georgia case, an appellate court allowed adult adoptees to receive distributions from a testamentary trust because the trust document did not specifically exclude adult adoptions.
Anyone adopting a friend should update their own will and trust immediately, and anyone who is a beneficiary of trusts referencing “children” or “descendants” should have those instruments reviewed before the adoption is finalized.
Tax Effects
The federal adoption tax credit does not apply. It is limited to adopting a child under 18 or a person who is physically or mentally incapable of self-care, so the legal fees, court costs, and other expenses of adopting an adult friend are entirely out-of-pocket.1Internal Revenue Service. Adoption Credit
Adoption also does not change gift tax rules between you and your friend. Cash, property, and other transfers are subject to the same thresholds as gifts to anyone else. For 2026, you can give up to $19,000 per recipient per year without a reporting requirement. Amounts above that require filing IRS Form 709, though no tax is owed unless your cumulative lifetime gifts exceed the $15,000,000 lifetime exemption.2Internal Revenue Service. What’s New – Estate and Gift Tax
Where adoption can produce a real tax advantage is in states with an inheritance tax. Several states tax inheritances by the relationship between the deceased and the beneficiary. Biological and adopted children usually fall into the most favorable category, often fully exempt or taxed at the lowest rate, while unrelated friends face the highest rates. Adoption can move the adoptee into a much lower bracket. The specifics depend entirely on the state.
What Adoption Cannot Do: Immigration
Adult adoption cannot create a path to U.S. citizenship or lawful permanent residency. Under federal immigration law, a “child” for family-based petitions must generally have been adopted before age 16. State-court adoption of an adult creates a legal parent-child relationship for state-law purposes only; federal immigration authorities do not recognize it as a basis for sponsoring a visa or green card.
This misconception has been exploited. In the 2023 Supreme Court case United States v. Hansen, the defendant was convicted for running a scheme that promised noncitizens citizenship through adult adoption. Courts are alert to the issue and will deny petitions that look motivated by immigration fraud. If your friend needs immigration help, adoption is not the answer, and pursuing it for that purpose can create legal exposure for both of you.
Health Insurance
Under the Affordable Care Act, health plans that offer dependent coverage must make it available until the dependent reaches age 26, and this applies to adopted children the same way it applies to biological children. If your adopted friend is under 26, you may be able to add them to your employer plan or marketplace plan.3U.S. Department of Labor. Young Adults and the Affordable Care Act Once your friend turns 26, that option ends. The adoption itself creates no health insurance eligibility beyond what the ACA already provides.
Name Changes and Updated ID
Many states let the adoption decree itself include a name change, which folds two court actions into one order. If the decree doesn’t include it, the adoptee files a separate name change petition.
With a court order in hand, the adoptee updates the Social Security card by bringing the original court order to the Social Security Administration along with proof of identity such as a driver’s license, state ID, or passport. The SSA requires original documents or certified copies and will not accept photocopies.4Social Security Administration. Learn What Documents You Will Need to Get a Social Security Card From there, the driver’s license, passport, bank accounts, and other records can be updated using the new Social Security card and court order. The state also issues a new or amended birth certificate reflecting the adoptive parent, which can take several weeks depending on the vital records office.
Reversing It Later
Adult adoption is meant to be permanent, but it can be undone in narrow circumstances. Reversal requires filing a petition to annul the adoption with the court that granted it. The adult adoptee generally has standing to petition on their own; the adoptive parent may also petition. The court holds a hearing and decides.
Reversal is not guaranteed. You cannot simply undo an adoption because the relationship soured. Grounds courts are more likely to accept include fraud, coercion, or a fundamental change in circumstances. Even if the annulment is granted, the effects on estate distributions, tax filings, and other transactions that already happened during the adoption may not unwind cleanly. Treat the decision as permanent, because in practical terms it almost always is.